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Old Jan 18, 2006, 08:18 PM // 20:18   #61
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You call on the Gods to help you. They all laugh in your face. You contemplate your life so far....you are still young and have not yet seen all of the world or done all of the things you wish to do. Now you are going to be married.............WAIT!!!! You don't want to be married yet!!!! Especially to some insane Grotto wench.
But......maybe it won't be so bad.....you imagine coming home from a hard day's work (hacking things to small pieces is hard work) to the aroma of freshly made fire imp chilli...Mmmmmm Mmmmmm good!
You snap out of it and the more likley reality of constant nagging and a never-ending list of chores becomes evident. You are doomed to a life of domestication and drudgery. She will no doubt become cold and domineering within seconds of you saying, "I do"
Do you:

A.) Flip open your communicator and say, "Beam me up Scotty."
C.) Look for a lawyer and get an annulment of your engagement.
D.) Start eyeing the other Grotto girlz.....after all - this is your last night as a free man.
E.) Start wishing you would have taken the Red Pill.
F.) Go hunting.......after all - this is your last night as a free man.
G.) Start organizing the reception, ordering up several kegs of ale and other important details.
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Old Jan 18, 2006, 09:11 PM // 21:11   #62
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You flip open your communicator and say 'Beam me up, Scotty.'
Hang on wait...when you were in the mountains before and thought of it it wasn't in your pocket...weird...something to do with the Gods?-
But your thoughts are interrupted as you fire up into the air as fast as a cannonball just released. You soon land on a small orange chair balanced precariously on the edge of a cloud. You hear music behind you, and turn around to see the Gods playing as a band.

Do you:

A) Ask where you are
B) Ask if you have got away from that woman and the marriage
C) Say, 'Whaa?'
D) Scream
E) Ask them if anyone has a fishing rod that you can use to go fishing (fishing people on the Earth, you guess)
F) Ask them 'Doesn't this defy all scientific theories?'
G) Sit down and watch them
H) Start singing to the music and hope they like it
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Old Jan 19, 2006, 01:11 AM // 01:11   #63
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You ask if you got away from that crazy chick and the wedding but they answer no your at the wedding grounds. Then the walls shut and your trapped and you see that the cloud is really white floor tiles at LA. But you remember you still got the cell phone and you see a boat heading towards Cantha. Do you:

A) Ingnore all the excape plans and just wait for the wedding to start in the morning.
B) Ask the operater for an exit
C) Call the Wedding Crashers to stop the wedding
D) Run to the Boat and say "So long crazy grotto chick"
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Old Jan 19, 2006, 07:24 AM // 07:24   #64
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You make a dash for the boat shouting 'So long crazy Grotto chick'. You un-tie the ropes from the pier and leap onto the ship. You raise the anchor. Ok, this is good, no-one can get to you now. Ummm...you could swear that you saw people on this ship...oh well. But wait...how do you sail a big ship like this single-handed?

Do you:

A) Call for the gods to come and be your crew
B) Click your fingers and hope a crew will appear
C) Jump back onto the pier and head back to the wedding, knowing there is no escape
D) Dance and hope it moves the ship
E) Attempt to sail the ship by yourself
F) Do nothing.
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Old Jan 19, 2006, 03:44 PM // 15:44   #65
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You begin dancing in hopes that it will move the ship. The ship does not move but 30 or 40 people come on board to watch you dance (you still haven't lost your talent) a few of them throw some gold at your feet. You tell them, "Thanks, but what I really need is for you to help me sail this thing."
They agree to sail the ship and make you captain if you will dance for them daily. You quickly agree and your new crew makes a speedy departure from the harbor. As you sail away you see your "bride" at the end of the pier cursing you loudly.
After several days of uneventful sailing and dancing a mate in the crows nest shouts, "Land HO!" You see an island with lush vegatation ahead.
Do you:

A.) Keep sailing.
B.) Return to Lions Arch, surely the crazy Grotto girl has left by now.
C.) Drop anchor and join a shore party to check out the island.
D.) Drop anchor and send a shore party to check out the island while you remain safely on your ship.
E.) Scuttle the ship and tell the crew, "Welcome to our new home!"
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Old Jan 19, 2006, 05:45 PM // 17:45   #66
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D.) Drop anchor and send a shore party to check out the island while you remain safely on your ship.

You drop anchor and send your party on shore while you wait safely on ship. Now it's time for you to make a decision that can not only change your morales but the fate of your life as well.

Will you...

A) Sail the ship by dancing on the starboard deck, and leaving the pitiful crew behind on the island. They'll be fine on their own. ( You have learned that this technique sails the ship the fastest while sailing )

B) Sit down and wait like a good boy.
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Old Jan 19, 2006, 08:15 PM // 20:15   #67
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You sit, and wait. And wait. And wait. And Wait. After several hours, one of the crew comes back, without an ear, screaming. He just says: "SKULL ISLAND! ITS SKULL ISLAND! ITS FULL OF DINOSSAURS, GIANT APES, AND CREEPY INSECTS! AND THEY GOT ANN!"
Then the man has a heart attack and just dies, leving you alone.

do you:

a) leave the ship and save the chick

b) sail away, alone, singing "sweet home lions arch"

c) leave the ship and explore the island, and try to find that giant ape

d) write a poem about seaturtles

e) sit and do nothin
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Old Jan 21, 2006, 03:17 AM // 03:17   #68
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You barely notice the man's screaming as you watch a seaturtle slowly swim through the ocean waters. You decide to write a poem about it and it's magnificence.

Seaturtle Seaturtle
Gleaming in the ocean sea
Seaturtle Seaturtle
Such a magnificent being
Seaturtle Seaturtle
Majestic wonder of grace
Seaturtle Seaturtle
---

You need a last line to finish the poem.

What will it be?

1) You are almost as handsome as my face
2) I can beat you in a race
3) The shark is following, take haste.
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Old Jan 21, 2006, 08:17 AM // 08:17   #69
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With a spark of excitement, you write 'I can beat you in a race'. You then strip off some of your outer clothing and leap off the side of the ship, leaving your poem behind. Clunk! You land on the shell of the turtle. It moans, then starts to swim with you on its back.

Do you:

A) Scream 'YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! TAKE ME HOME, TURTLE!'
B. Stand up and dance on the shell as the turtle swims.
C) Scream and jump off, trying to get back to the ship
D) Ride it in silence.
E) Attempt to strangle it (? ABUSE)
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Old Jan 21, 2006, 03:32 PM // 15:32   #70
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You Scream 'YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! TAKE ME HOME, TURTLE!'. The turtle begins to swim away from the ship, but then you remember that you left that expensive armor on the ship, and you havent saved Ann from the giant ape yet.

do you:

a) jump from the turtle and recover your armor.

b) stay on the turtle and leave your armor

c) jump from the turtle and find the giant ape
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Old Jan 21, 2006, 11:16 PM // 23:16   #71
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(A)

Whew, that was close. You wouldn't want to leave behind your armor, would you? Trying to find the turtle, you're sad to see that it's swam off farther than you can swim with all that heavy armor on...

You decide that there's only two things to do now:

A) Step off the ship and look for King Ko-I mean...the giant monster that kidnapped Ann.

B) Sail away, leaving the damsel in distress on the horrible island.
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Old Jan 21, 2006, 11:35 PM // 23:35   #72
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One "Ann" in this story is enough. You sail away, leaving that sorry wench to fend for herself. After a few hours you start to feel guilty so you take a vote with the remaining crew on whether to go back and attmpt resue or not.
The vote goes:

A.) Return with all speed and make a daring rescue.
B.) Keep going, less people to split any future loot with now.
C.) Return to LA and turn the captain over to the grotto chick.
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Old Jan 22, 2006, 02:14 PM // 14:14   #73
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The crew hated Ann anyway, she was ugly and fat. so we decide that since there are fewer, more loot to us! You sail to anotherisland, where there are 15 real chic monks dancing on the beach. you,

A) Decide to beach
B) Pass on
C) Land and kill them all!
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Old Jan 23, 2006, 02:55 PM // 14:55   #74
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You direct the crew to beach the ship on the island. after taking everything salvageable from the ship you find that the chic monks are actually chipmonks Damn that lookout with a lisp! Now you are stranded on an island with 15 dancing chipmonks and an angry crew. Old fat Ann is looking better every minute.

Do you:

A.) Break out the rum and get wasted.

B.) Assemble any scrap wood you find into a giant SOS sign and wait till evening and light it, hoping for rescue.

C.) Whip out a map with X marking the spot of buried treasure to distract the crew while you make your getaway in the dinghy
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Old Jan 23, 2006, 06:46 PM // 18:46   #75
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You Whip out a map with X marking the spot of buried treasure to distract the crew while you make your getaway in the dinghy. It works fine but you fall asleep, and the dinghy crashes against some rocks. You swim to then next island and, surprise, its the skull island (yes i really want to go there)


do you:

a) explore the island and find the fat Ann.

b) look for the giant ape

c) write a poem about ants

d) just sit and cry

e) swim to LA
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Old Jan 24, 2006, 05:42 PM // 17:42   #76
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You decide to explore the island and find the fat Ann. You cinch you helmet down tight to protect your ears and head inland. Soon you are deep in a rainforest-like environment, the sun is blocked out by several canopies of plant growth. The trail you have been following has all but dwindled away and you are questioning your wisdom in even venturing in here. Suddenly, you are set upon by a giant ape!!! He has come at you from behind and your way back to the shore is blocked by his bulk. The dense jungle growth prevents your passage right or left except for one small opening near a black rock. Your way forward, deeper into the jungle is also open. You notice that the giant ape has Ann in one large hand and is waving her around madly. She screams at you to help her.
Do you:

A.) Run for the opening in the jungle by the black rock.

B.) Run forward, deeper into the jungle.

C.) Distract the giant ape with a banana and try to rescue Ann.
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Old Feb 01, 2006, 03:21 AM // 03:21   #77
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You distract the giant ape with a banana and try to rescue Ann but suddenly 3 other giant apes appear from the jungle and surround you. They appear very angry and completely ignore the banana you are holding. Do you:
A) Cast Sprint and run like hell.
B) Take out your Chaos Axe and charge towards the apes.
C) Scream for Ann to help you.
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Old Feb 03, 2006, 07:55 AM // 07:55   #78
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You take out your chaos axe and bravely charge forward. Instead of moving forward to squish/eat/rip you apart, the three apes start laughing. 'That's a bit of an attitude you've got there son,' says one. 'Maybe we need to sort you out,' says another. They all laugh and start dancing. They are smashing their hands on the ground, causing you to repeatedly fall over.

Do you:

A. Shout 'STOP! STOP! AHHHHHH!'
B. Ask them politely to stop and tell them their other ape friend has taken somoene you know and you want to get her back.
C. Tell them to stop and then try to attack them.
D. Laugh and enjoy the bouncing
E. Try to get away
F. Cry
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